Today was graduation day. Not for me, but for the second years who thus by nature are infinitely more wise and experienced and ready-for-the-world than us menial first-years. I am really happy for them. I was fortunate enough to become friends with several second years, which only made the day a little more tough on my sensitive emotions. Nonetheless, I know they're off to change the world, in whatever way that may be: international policy, domestic policy, nonprofit management, private sector, etc. Today was the day, as the class speaker said, that they changed from "future policymakers" to just plain "policymakers." Wow.
Anyway, by far the best part of the already short ceremony was when the student-nominated speaker got up and spoke about something so simple as happiness. Yes, a speech on happiness definitely has the potential to turn awry, but I gave him a chance, and it turned out to be a good decision on my part. Basically, his speech was simply a really eloquent way of having the audience question themselves about their meaning of friendship, and what makes them happy? Ben, the speaker, concluded that friends make us happy. I couldn't agree more. Friendships and relationships naturally come with the potential for frustration, heartbreak, disappointment and separation, but those are the risks we all take by 'accepting' our friendships and developing them into whatever they become. The time we spend with our friends --whether it is studying, eating, cooking, making fools of ourselves, or reflecting together--helps shape us into who we are and what we become. And while there may not be any certain distinguishable moment of are friends really 'shaping' or changing us, it just happens. And that in itself is, not to sound cliche, a really beautiful thing. And that, my friends, is the type of thing that makes me really nostalgic and happy, and reminds me of how blessed I am to have all my amazing friends and family in my life.
I was really *happy* that Ben decided to talk about happiness, especially in the way he did. The last thing graduate students need to hear before leaving academia is about our "potential," "intellect" and "accomplishments." While obviously graduating from graduate school DOES involve all of these great things, I think it's so much more meaningful to emphasize the aspects of our time at school outside of the classroom to reflect on who we are, as real people.
Maybe I'm totally overreacting to a simple graduation speech, but it just made me really...happy!
Congrats to all you Bushies! I'm excited to see where we all end up!
So...what's happiness to you?
Saturday, May 15, 2010
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
Times they are a changin'
I didn’t know what it was at first. Don’t get me wrong, I’m enjoying my time here in grad school—as much as one can enjoy endless hours of mind-numbing readings—but something just wasn’t right. It was until tonight, when I ‘became a fan’ of an old high school friend on facebook who has taken up singing and songwriting. Listening to her lyrics and hearing the calm music made me realize my problem: my creative instinct has been sedated since coming here.; I feel suffocated! I’m not blaming the Bush School for doing that; rather, I think I just thrive in environments where I am surrounded by a diverse group of individuals who make me…make me not take life so seriously. I am referring both to my time at Southwestern, as well as my time abroad. I love exploring, sitting under a tree and enjoying the moment, taking in a deep breath of the fresh air, laying under the sun and the stars, and just taking every moment for what it’s worth.
I don’t want to steal my above friend’s thunder, but I’ve always loved singing. I may or may not be blessed with a good voice, though my younger brother always complimented me years ago (maybe just to be nice, maybe to boost my ego…who knows!), but I’ve always thought it was something only those select and very lucky people ever get to actually do. But, as my friend has proven, anyone can do it, AND be good at it! I’m not suggesting that this is a cure to my boredom or dissatisfaction (because I’m not really THAT dissatisfied!), but it might hold a lucky charm somewhere down the road…
In the meantime, however, and although I recognized my “problem” earlier last semester, I think I’m going to go find more interesting things to do here in College Station! I don’t want to say that there’s nothing to do here, because there is, but…there’s not THAT much to do, nor do I have a lot of time! Nonetheless, maybe hitting up a new trail on the bike will be good, a swim in Lake Bryan, a picnic outside, or just going outside and enjoying it more! That was one of the greatest things about Southwestern to me: we had this huge lawn (we called it “the mall”) out in the middle of campus where people would play Frisbee, hang out, read a book, or a take a nap. If it was a sunny day, you could bet big money on there being at least a small crowd out there (or at Lake Georgetown…). Being outside not only calms me down, it allows me the chance to take in a few extra breaths of fresh air and refuel. I mean, going to school with a bunch of hippies might have had something to do with me feeling more at ease there, too, so who knows…the conglomeration of all aspects of Southwestern’s environment and atmosphere was really special.
It was definitely a HUGE culture shock not only to leave super liberal Southwestern and come to uber conservative College Station, but also to leave a small school environment and come to a huge campus where I feel like a needle in the haystack…The Bush School is different from the main A&M campus, though for some reason (probably all of those mentioned above) I feel like I have a stick up my ass here and I can’t be my goofy, lighthearted self anymore! And that, more than anything, annoys the hell outta me! (I hope this isn’t a natural part of growing up…)
Remedy? Well, a few more hours in the day would help, but really, I just need to try and revisit my old self…gee, I sound like I’m a completely different person now, but I’m not, I promise… I just feel off. Though, now that I can really identify why I was feeling so off kilter, I can fix it, right?! I also plan to be spending more hours out of the Bush School, and outside instead! I know this will help!
I guess I’m just a tree hugger kind-of-gal.
I don’t want to steal my above friend’s thunder, but I’ve always loved singing. I may or may not be blessed with a good voice, though my younger brother always complimented me years ago (maybe just to be nice, maybe to boost my ego…who knows!), but I’ve always thought it was something only those select and very lucky people ever get to actually do. But, as my friend has proven, anyone can do it, AND be good at it! I’m not suggesting that this is a cure to my boredom or dissatisfaction (because I’m not really THAT dissatisfied!), but it might hold a lucky charm somewhere down the road…
In the meantime, however, and although I recognized my “problem” earlier last semester, I think I’m going to go find more interesting things to do here in College Station! I don’t want to say that there’s nothing to do here, because there is, but…there’s not THAT much to do, nor do I have a lot of time! Nonetheless, maybe hitting up a new trail on the bike will be good, a swim in Lake Bryan, a picnic outside, or just going outside and enjoying it more! That was one of the greatest things about Southwestern to me: we had this huge lawn (we called it “the mall”) out in the middle of campus where people would play Frisbee, hang out, read a book, or a take a nap. If it was a sunny day, you could bet big money on there being at least a small crowd out there (or at Lake Georgetown…). Being outside not only calms me down, it allows me the chance to take in a few extra breaths of fresh air and refuel. I mean, going to school with a bunch of hippies might have had something to do with me feeling more at ease there, too, so who knows…the conglomeration of all aspects of Southwestern’s environment and atmosphere was really special.
It was definitely a HUGE culture shock not only to leave super liberal Southwestern and come to uber conservative College Station, but also to leave a small school environment and come to a huge campus where I feel like a needle in the haystack…The Bush School is different from the main A&M campus, though for some reason (probably all of those mentioned above) I feel like I have a stick up my ass here and I can’t be my goofy, lighthearted self anymore! And that, more than anything, annoys the hell outta me! (I hope this isn’t a natural part of growing up…)
Remedy? Well, a few more hours in the day would help, but really, I just need to try and revisit my old self…gee, I sound like I’m a completely different person now, but I’m not, I promise… I just feel off. Though, now that I can really identify why I was feeling so off kilter, I can fix it, right?! I also plan to be spending more hours out of the Bush School, and outside instead! I know this will help!
I guess I’m just a tree hugger kind-of-gal.
Friday, June 6, 2008
MOROCCO!!
Alright, I realize it's now been over a month since I went to Morocco, but after I got back I was swamped with tests (believe it or not...), packing, and living life, so I just never got around to writing about it...but hey, better late than never, right?
Ok. I'd have to say that my weekend in Morocco was officially one of my favorite weekends the entire semester...crazy! Let's see, I loved it that much, that I basically have a play-by-play here, it's long and (maybe) detailed, so just warning.
I went with a program called Morocco Exchange, which is set up to cater just small groups of students, take them to parts of Morocco that one wouldn't get the chance to see or experience were they just traveling as tourists, and is basically the only way I'd want to go to Morocco...maybe because it's a country that is just so foreign to me--people, religion, culture, etc.--so what the program offered was just incredible, costs aside. haha.
Morocco was incredible. incredible. I honestly can't put into words my experience, I had soo much fun, made some amazing friends, and learned a ton! wow! . So I left Granada Wednesday evening on a bus to the port city Algeciras to spend the night in a hostal, cuz Thursday morning we all met up at 8 am to take the ferry across the Straight. Immediately I clicked with this girl, Jenny, she was wearing a track and field shirt, and so I just asked her about that, and luckily she turned out to be in my group! (there were 3 different groups going, ours was the best, we had the most dynamic people and we all bonded...according to yours truly.) So anyway, Jenny came with some other people from her program in Cordoba, a group of students from all over California, and she and her 'best' friend in the group, Jen, and I just all clicked right away, which was something I was actually fearing. Going alone and not with a group had worried me until I met our group...because if you know me you know I can be suuper shy, so I had told myself I COULDNT be timid or hold back because if I didn't make friends I'd be miserable the whole time, so luckily it all worked out. anyway,so basically in our group there was 16 or 17 of us, and our leader was Lindsey, a girl who was in the Peace Corps in Morocco a year ago for 2 years, and for the past year she's just been doing this Morocco Exchange program and living in Spain. It was her last trip as a leader cuz she's returning to the states for grad school, which made it really nostalgic and bittersweet for her, but she was an amazing leader. She speaks Arabic and knows a ton about the culture, the people, the history, etc. which definitely benefited our group...So we get to Morocco, we land in Tangiers, an up and coming port city that the king is trying to develop, and we exchange money, get our van, and head over to a more central location where Lindsey and all of us got out and basically just followed her around the crazy market while she bought us tons of fruit and snacks for later. This market was crazy. Crazier than in Chile. They sell ANYTHING and EVERYTHING food related you could ever possibly want or imagine. There were dead chickens hanging from strings, chickens with their heads still on but all plucked so it looked really funny and weird, tons of fruit and veggies, and other random stuff. it was really cool. After that we all headed over to a place called Darna, it's a women's center that provides lessons in tons of things to help women learn a skill so they can then find a job. They teach languages there, teach them how to use computers, how to sew and weave both traditionally and 'modernly', there's a salon where they can learn how to wash and style and cut hair, there's a kitchen where they learn how to cook, and then they sell their products, no matter what it is, and all the proceeds benefit the center to make it better. There we talked to 2 translation students from the university and one linguistics student. A side note: most Moroccans speak various languages: French, Arabic (both classical and Morocco's dialect), English and Spanish. We all sat and had tea together and we were able to ask them any questions we had, that we had thought about before, or that we had observed in the last 1 hr of being in Morocco. That discussion was reaaaallllllly interesting. We got to cover topics from politics, to religion to dating to homosexuality to school to free time. I mean, you're in this country that is an hour away from Europe, but is still so different, and it really gets you thinking. And then on top of that you add the whole religion element, since it forms a HUGE part of their life, and you're just filled with amazement and curiosity and bewilderment and excitement and a sense that you'll just never fully understand. But it's exhilarating, and that's basically how I felt the whole long weekend.
After that we all had lunch together, it was this delicious chicken tagine (?) dish served in some sort of broth with bread and veggies. Then we all got back in the van and headed off to the capital city of Rabat. But on the way, Lindsey 'surprised' us (most of us knew...oops) with stopping along the side of the road to ride camels on the beach!! Obviously I was stoked, so the camel experience was fun. It was just a short walk on the camel, like 5 minutes, but it was still cool. camels are WEIRD. and some are SCARY. especially when there is a pregnant one, the male one likes to try and attack her. it's scary. luckily they tied up the fierce male. Ok a note for whoever may ride a camel in the future: when camels get up and then go down, their joints are ridiculous. the advice lindsey gave us was just "hold on" oh man was she right. When they're standing up, it feels like you're going to fall off the back of them, and when their going down, it feel like you're going to go off the front of them. Luckily neither happened, though some pictures of me seem the opposite...haha.
Ok so after that, we got back in the van, all of us needing to pee like none other, for a little bit more car ride. Once we got to Rabat, Lindsey brought us all to this one house, it was our meeting spot and the boys in our groups' host family, where we met our host families. Luckily we got to choose our roommates so Jenny and Jen and I hooked up and decided to wait for the family that wasn't there yet, and ended up waiting a good hour and drinking tea with this unknown yet so welcoming family that we can't even communicate with, to wait for our host sister to pick us up. It was during this time, and right when we got to the house to be introduced to everyone, when I really realized the importance of community in the Moroccan life. Everyone is community, and apparently up to 7 neighbors on each side of your house is normally treated as family. It's just so important in their culture, and probably my favorite part. So anyway, the tea there, MINT TEA, is to die for. First of all, they use about 25 spoonfuls of sugar per teapot, and man its just soooo good. haha when we were talking to the students earlier in the day we talked about the tea and how it's just something you can drink whenever you want--there's no certain 'tea time' in morocco cuz tea is perfect for every situation, I don't blame them. hah and then one student, when we asked approximately how often he drinks this tea a day, he responded, "usually 15 times" HOLY COW. AND, not surprisingly, diabetes is getting to be a problem in morocco. wonder why...?!
So anyway, our host sister arrives to get us, she's this absolutely gorgeous and outgoing girl, she wasn't dressed in the 'traditional' wear and wasn't wearing a scarf around her head, but instead was dressed trendily, which surprised us after what we had already heard and seen.
So she took us to her house, it was awesome! the traditional Moroccan house--now just the bigger ones--are designed to be 2-3 stories tall, you walk in to this big courtyard in the middle, with all the rooms just bordering. The rooms don't all have doors, are intricately decorated, and the walls are lined with curtains and are typically a room with, I forget what they're called, but they're pseudo couches/beds just lining the walls on all four sides, with pretty fabric and tons of pillows.
This is where they sleep. They don't have beds. But it's such a good idea cuz it saves space and it's fancy all at the same time! oh, and we ate there. awesomeness. so anyway, That night before dinner, our sister, Tima, took us three out to the market so we could see 'night life' in Morocco. it was crazy. absolutely crazy. and Moroccans are even more outwardly about staring and trying to get your attention, though somehow in a less creepy way than in Spain. hmm. Anyway, so at one point Tima grabs my arm and just says, hold on to me, I don't want you getting lost, and I care about you. um, I had met her like an hour ago. I know this may seem trivial, but its such a part of their culture... they are so overwhelmingly welcoming and caring to their guests. ok so anyway, she ended up taking us to a supermarket where she did some 'shopping'...the three of us concluded that she doesn't typically shop for food...haha. then we went home, had dinner which was this delicious soup with lentils and rice and chicken and veggies, and some potatoes things that were amazing. then we hit the sack. it was a long day.
The next day we woke up early had an AMAZING breakfast of this sort of fried bread/pancake thing, and mint tea. We met up with the group and all headed out to talk to a professor at the university to ask her any questions and to hear more about Morocco, the culture, the people, everything. This talk was different because she gave more realistic answers, and not really sugar-coated like the other students did the day before. She was more objective and real about it. Let me just say that Morocco is a world you could never imagine. I was just so incredibly confused and amazed about it all, in a good way, and while I had a lot of my questions and confusions and doubts answered, there is still so much more to it than I could ever imagine. after that, we headed over to some old roman ruins where an old king is buried, i think, and a super ancient mosque and gardens. there were soooo many stork's nest there it reminded us all of a dr. seuss book or something! then we went to the big mosque and mauseleum where the last king is buried i believe, and it was just after prayer time and the mosque had just closed, so we couldnt approach it or look in, but we got to stand out side where there were all these pillars where there were going to build somthing a long time ago but never did, and got to watch all the men coming out of the mosque. it was really incredible. i just cant get over how religion just rules this country.
Next, we all went back to our host family's houses for lunch. and typically in morocco, families eat couscous--typical Moroccan cuisine--one day a week, and luckily for us that day is Friday, so we all, or at least in my house, got to try homemade delicious couscous. Our host mom was an amazing cook, and basically couscous is traditionally served and eaten out of this giant dish. there is couscous on the bottom, like tons of it, and then on top is basically huge vegetables and meat if the family likes meat. and then we all just sat around the table eating directly out of the dish. After that we met with the group again to go get in small groups and talk and walk with university students. They walked with us around the city, showed us some sights, and then we all went to a hookah bar together.
After that, we went to this Arab bath house, called a hamman. For people who don't live in the city, they come in to a city like Rabat that has them once a week to bathe, and the other people I talked to typically went once every 1-2 wks. Here's how it works: obviously, girls and guys are separated; you get down to your underwear or naked, whichever you prefer; there are 3 rooms, all varying in heat; there's one that's really hot and steamy and has super hot water, and its like hotter than a sauna, there's a middle one, still hot and steamy and sauna-y but with a tad bit less hot water, then the last one, still hot and steamy. haa. So you get this bucket, fill it with water, and sit on the ground in this crowded room and bathe yourself. The ladies there were really nice and gave us their special soap and their scrubbers and showed us how to do it. Basically after being in there for 10 minutes in the heat and steam makes you skin just come off when you scrub it. it's awesome. You get soooooooo clean. I was so obsessed with scrubbing myself I didn't want to stop, the only thing that convinced me to get out of there was the heat. But I scrubbed my body from top to bottom, had my friends scrub my back, and ended up scrubbing my face--I was afraid it'd like peel off my freckles or something (is that stupid?!)--but that was the best decision ever, cuz I left that place with baby soft skin everywhere!
Then we all either went home or to get henna. We went to get henna. The two daughters at the main meeting house did it to the tops of our hands. Then finally we all went back home for our last night with our host families, even though at that point it was 11 pm. We got home to our dinner waiting for us in our room, I had no appetite but decided to eat a little, it was sardines (that she had bought the night before due to a joke jen told at the supermarket...jenny and I were so mad!) and rice and veggies and some other stuff. i tried the rice with sardines but just couldn't do it...I'm telling you this cuz i'm blaming the sardines on what would happen the following day.
So the next day we get up super early to head out to the next city. It was Saturday at 7 am and Tima got up and made us breakfast and ate with us, really sweet. then we all got into the van to head out to a more rural place where we were going to eat lunch with a family up in the mountains, mroe conservative, etc. The drive was super long and windy, like 3 hrs. We were in the very last row of this 16 seat bus. I normally don't get motion sickness like ever unless I'm sitting backwards, but I'm convinced the sardines mixed with the bumps and turns made me go bad. I ate a banana on the way...luckily nothing else. I was fine the whole time until we got to the house in the mountains. I mean, I felt awful and sweaty and not normal, but i just tried to keep it to myself, thinking it'd go away right away. wrong. we're all siting at the house on the ground, they just brought out the food to make delicious sandwiches with, i had no appetite, so i just took a nibble at a carrot slice and then i felt it. i stood up and basically was like, "if i have to throw up where do i do it?" so lindsey brought me over to some trees, i didnt throw up, but i ended up laying down in the house, trying to sleep but not being able to, my stomach pounding with pain, and oh man. so i miss the lunch and the talk the group got to have with the family --apparently extremely different and interesting, oh well-- and then just couldnt stand lying down anymore so i sat up and that's wehn it really hit me. i ran outside, started throwing up in my mouth but covered my mouth with my hand till i got to the trees, so it started spilling out and it ended up comign through my nose! gagg!! anyway, I end up throwing up my banana and the tiny bite of carrot and like a ton of other stuff...it just wouldn't stop coming out it was weird. too much information?!?! Then I felt better, sorta, still not normal, so I just sat outside and waited for them to finish talking to the family. and so then like 15 minutes later we're about to start walking towards the van when I was like holy cow. I ended up vomiting for 5 minutes there. I don't even KNOW what I was throwing up. I just couldnt control it!! so we get back in the van, start making the drive to our last city Chefchaouen, it was like an hr drive, I switched seats with someone up toward the front, and thought all would be fine. wrong. I asked Pablo, the Brazilian guy sitting next to me at the PERFECT time for a plastic bag just in case I needed it, and he handed it over to me right in the perfect moment for when I needed to puke. haha. so they stop the van, i get out, vomit, the driver gets out, starts talking to me in arabic to get on my knees and pours water over my neck, then pours some in my hands apparently telling me to drink it, but i thought he meant to splash my face, so i splash my face and the whole van starts cracking up, and phewwww. i had vomit all over me!! so i sat up very front with the wind blowing in my face till we got there, and all was good! so we get to chechauoen, its a pretty touristy city, it's in the north so a lot of spaniards go there and everyone speaks Spanish, and we were just there for the night to go shopping and eat and sleep in a hostel so I thought I was fine. I mean, I still felt kinda queezy but fine. so I bought a sprite to try and get something in my stomach, I sip on that, me and Jenny and Jen all go shopping, all is fine. we go to this place where they guy gives us a deal on the earrings and ends up being really nice to us three, helping us find each other when we couldn't find eachother etc. haha. so i'm looking at some stuff, and I was like, I don't feel good, I'm sorta sick and he was like, here, sit here. and so I sat. and then i was like, oh no. so he grabs me and runs me over to this public fountain where people can get water (its like a faucet, not your fountain fountain) and i get there at the perfect moment to throw up all the sprite i had drinken. and then some. dear lord it was weird. so I sat there for a bit while the other two shopped, then went and bought a shirt/dress thingy and sucked at bargaining so ended up paying way too much for it haha. oh well.. Needless to say I skipped out on dinner that night and made an attempt at sleeping...to no avail.
The next and last morning we got up early to take a hike up to a site to overlook the city at sunrise, it was cool and pretty. I felt a whole lot better then, just weak and sorta hungry, probably dehydrated. so then we got back in the van and headed back to a city called Ceuta, which is on teh african continent but is actually spanish territory, so we ended up walking across the 'border' between morocco and spain. kinda cool. then we took the ferry back across the straight to catch our respective rides home.
Morocco. I loved it. The weekend went by way too fast. I would've loved to stay there a lot longer. i just LOVE cross-cultural exchange. I think it should somehow be mandatory, cuz its sooo important to learn about other cultures to be able to understand them and why they do the things they do. I could say a trillion other things about it, like all the details and quotes from the weekend, but i think I've said enough for now! It was also on this trip that I realized I love traveling, but I love the type of traveling where you get to KNOW the people, culture, etc. I mean, going to Hungary and everywhere else is cool, but when you travel like that you're only seeing the outside. You don't get to know the ins and outs of their life, which I think is way more interesting and important than simply historical buildings and statues. And I suppose especially in a place like Morocco, where it's like no other country you've ever been to...well, out of South America and Europe... If I hadn't gone with this exchange program, there's no way I would've learned what I did and seen what I did. half the places we saw and went were places that tourists would never see. And I got to talk to Moroccans! And relate with them, and live with them!
gosh!
so yes, that's it. my long weekend in a big nutshell!
Ok. I'd have to say that my weekend in Morocco was officially one of my favorite weekends the entire semester...crazy! Let's see, I loved it that much, that I basically have a play-by-play here, it's long and (maybe) detailed, so just warning.
I went with a program called Morocco Exchange, which is set up to cater just small groups of students, take them to parts of Morocco that one wouldn't get the chance to see or experience were they just traveling as tourists, and is basically the only way I'd want to go to Morocco...maybe because it's a country that is just so foreign to me--people, religion, culture, etc.--so what the program offered was just incredible, costs aside. haha.
Morocco was incredible. incredible. I honestly can't put into words my experience, I had soo much fun, made some amazing friends, and learned a ton! wow! . So I left Granada Wednesday evening on a bus to the port city Algeciras to spend the night in a hostal, cuz Thursday morning we all met up at 8 am to take the ferry across the Straight. Immediately I clicked with this girl, Jenny, she was wearing a track and field shirt, and so I just asked her about that, and luckily she turned out to be in my group! (there were 3 different groups going, ours was the best, we had the most dynamic people and we all bonded...according to yours truly.) So anyway, Jenny came with some other people from her program in Cordoba, a group of students from all over California, and she and her 'best' friend in the group, Jen, and I just all clicked right away, which was something I was actually fearing. Going alone and not with a group had worried me until I met our group...because if you know me you know I can be suuper shy, so I had told myself I COULDNT be timid or hold back because if I didn't make friends I'd be miserable the whole time, so luckily it all worked out. anyway,so basically in our group there was 16 or 17 of us, and our leader was Lindsey, a girl who was in the Peace Corps in Morocco a year ago for 2 years, and for the past year she's just been doing this Morocco Exchange program and living in Spain. It was her last trip as a leader cuz she's returning to the states for grad school, which made it really nostalgic and bittersweet for her, but she was an amazing leader. She speaks Arabic and knows a ton about the culture, the people, the history, etc. which definitely benefited our group...So we get to Morocco, we land in Tangiers, an up and coming port city that the king is trying to develop, and we exchange money, get our van, and head over to a more central location where Lindsey and all of us got out and basically just followed her around the crazy market while she bought us tons of fruit and snacks for later. This market was crazy. Crazier than in Chile. They sell ANYTHING and EVERYTHING food related you could ever possibly want or imagine. There were dead chickens hanging from strings, chickens with their heads still on but all plucked so it looked really funny and weird, tons of fruit and veggies, and other random stuff. it was really cool. After that we all headed over to a place called Darna, it's a women's center that provides lessons in tons of things to help women learn a skill so they can then find a job. They teach languages there, teach them how to use computers, how to sew and weave both traditionally and 'modernly', there's a salon where they can learn how to wash and style and cut hair, there's a kitchen where they learn how to cook, and then they sell their products, no matter what it is, and all the proceeds benefit the center to make it better. There we talked to 2 translation students from the university and one linguistics student. A side note: most Moroccans speak various languages: French, Arabic (both classical and Morocco's dialect), English and Spanish. We all sat and had tea together and we were able to ask them any questions we had, that we had thought about before, or that we had observed in the last 1 hr of being in Morocco. That discussion was reaaaallllllly interesting. We got to cover topics from politics, to religion to dating to homosexuality to school to free time. I mean, you're in this country that is an hour away from Europe, but is still so different, and it really gets you thinking. And then on top of that you add the whole religion element, since it forms a HUGE part of their life, and you're just filled with amazement and curiosity and bewilderment and excitement and a sense that you'll just never fully understand. But it's exhilarating, and that's basically how I felt the whole long weekend.
After that we all had lunch together, it was this delicious chicken tagine (?) dish served in some sort of broth with bread and veggies. Then we all got back in the van and headed off to the capital city of Rabat. But on the way, Lindsey 'surprised' us (most of us knew...oops) with stopping along the side of the road to ride camels on the beach!! Obviously I was stoked, so the camel experience was fun. It was just a short walk on the camel, like 5 minutes, but it was still cool. camels are WEIRD. and some are SCARY. especially when there is a pregnant one, the male one likes to try and attack her. it's scary. luckily they tied up the fierce male. Ok a note for whoever may ride a camel in the future: when camels get up and then go down, their joints are ridiculous. the advice lindsey gave us was just "hold on" oh man was she right. When they're standing up, it feels like you're going to fall off the back of them, and when their going down, it feel like you're going to go off the front of them. Luckily neither happened, though some pictures of me seem the opposite...haha.
Ok so after that, we got back in the van, all of us needing to pee like none other, for a little bit more car ride. Once we got to Rabat, Lindsey brought us all to this one house, it was our meeting spot and the boys in our groups' host family, where we met our host families. Luckily we got to choose our roommates so Jenny and Jen and I hooked up and decided to wait for the family that wasn't there yet, and ended up waiting a good hour and drinking tea with this unknown yet so welcoming family that we can't even communicate with, to wait for our host sister to pick us up. It was during this time, and right when we got to the house to be introduced to everyone, when I really realized the importance of community in the Moroccan life. Everyone is community, and apparently up to 7 neighbors on each side of your house is normally treated as family. It's just so important in their culture, and probably my favorite part. So anyway, the tea there, MINT TEA, is to die for. First of all, they use about 25 spoonfuls of sugar per teapot, and man its just soooo good. haha when we were talking to the students earlier in the day we talked about the tea and how it's just something you can drink whenever you want--there's no certain 'tea time' in morocco cuz tea is perfect for every situation, I don't blame them. hah and then one student, when we asked approximately how often he drinks this tea a day, he responded, "usually 15 times" HOLY COW. AND, not surprisingly, diabetes is getting to be a problem in morocco. wonder why...?!
So anyway, our host sister arrives to get us, she's this absolutely gorgeous and outgoing girl, she wasn't dressed in the 'traditional' wear and wasn't wearing a scarf around her head, but instead was dressed trendily, which surprised us after what we had already heard and seen.
So she took us to her house, it was awesome! the traditional Moroccan house--now just the bigger ones--are designed to be 2-3 stories tall, you walk in to this big courtyard in the middle, with all the rooms just bordering. The rooms don't all have doors, are intricately decorated, and the walls are lined with curtains and are typically a room with, I forget what they're called, but they're pseudo couches/beds just lining the walls on all four sides, with pretty fabric and tons of pillows.
This is where they sleep. They don't have beds. But it's such a good idea cuz it saves space and it's fancy all at the same time! oh, and we ate there. awesomeness. so anyway, That night before dinner, our sister, Tima, took us three out to the market so we could see 'night life' in Morocco. it was crazy. absolutely crazy. and Moroccans are even more outwardly about staring and trying to get your attention, though somehow in a less creepy way than in Spain. hmm. Anyway, so at one point Tima grabs my arm and just says, hold on to me, I don't want you getting lost, and I care about you. um, I had met her like an hour ago. I know this may seem trivial, but its such a part of their culture... they are so overwhelmingly welcoming and caring to their guests. ok so anyway, she ended up taking us to a supermarket where she did some 'shopping'...the three of us concluded that she doesn't typically shop for food...haha. then we went home, had dinner which was this delicious soup with lentils and rice and chicken and veggies, and some potatoes things that were amazing. then we hit the sack. it was a long day.
The next day we woke up early had an AMAZING breakfast of this sort of fried bread/pancake thing, and mint tea. We met up with the group and all headed out to talk to a professor at the university to ask her any questions and to hear more about Morocco, the culture, the people, everything. This talk was different because she gave more realistic answers, and not really sugar-coated like the other students did the day before. She was more objective and real about it. Let me just say that Morocco is a world you could never imagine. I was just so incredibly confused and amazed about it all, in a good way, and while I had a lot of my questions and confusions and doubts answered, there is still so much more to it than I could ever imagine. after that, we headed over to some old roman ruins where an old king is buried, i think, and a super ancient mosque and gardens. there were soooo many stork's nest there it reminded us all of a dr. seuss book or something! then we went to the big mosque and mauseleum where the last king is buried i believe, and it was just after prayer time and the mosque had just closed, so we couldnt approach it or look in, but we got to stand out side where there were all these pillars where there were going to build somthing a long time ago but never did, and got to watch all the men coming out of the mosque. it was really incredible. i just cant get over how religion just rules this country.
Next, we all went back to our host family's houses for lunch. and typically in morocco, families eat couscous--typical Moroccan cuisine--one day a week, and luckily for us that day is Friday, so we all, or at least in my house, got to try homemade delicious couscous. Our host mom was an amazing cook, and basically couscous is traditionally served and eaten out of this giant dish. there is couscous on the bottom, like tons of it, and then on top is basically huge vegetables and meat if the family likes meat. and then we all just sat around the table eating directly out of the dish. After that we met with the group again to go get in small groups and talk and walk with university students. They walked with us around the city, showed us some sights, and then we all went to a hookah bar together.
After that, we went to this Arab bath house, called a hamman. For people who don't live in the city, they come in to a city like Rabat that has them once a week to bathe, and the other people I talked to typically went once every 1-2 wks. Here's how it works: obviously, girls and guys are separated; you get down to your underwear or naked, whichever you prefer; there are 3 rooms, all varying in heat; there's one that's really hot and steamy and has super hot water, and its like hotter than a sauna, there's a middle one, still hot and steamy and sauna-y but with a tad bit less hot water, then the last one, still hot and steamy. haa. So you get this bucket, fill it with water, and sit on the ground in this crowded room and bathe yourself. The ladies there were really nice and gave us their special soap and their scrubbers and showed us how to do it. Basically after being in there for 10 minutes in the heat and steam makes you skin just come off when you scrub it. it's awesome. You get soooooooo clean. I was so obsessed with scrubbing myself I didn't want to stop, the only thing that convinced me to get out of there was the heat. But I scrubbed my body from top to bottom, had my friends scrub my back, and ended up scrubbing my face--I was afraid it'd like peel off my freckles or something (is that stupid?!)--but that was the best decision ever, cuz I left that place with baby soft skin everywhere!
Then we all either went home or to get henna. We went to get henna. The two daughters at the main meeting house did it to the tops of our hands. Then finally we all went back home for our last night with our host families, even though at that point it was 11 pm. We got home to our dinner waiting for us in our room, I had no appetite but decided to eat a little, it was sardines (that she had bought the night before due to a joke jen told at the supermarket...jenny and I were so mad!) and rice and veggies and some other stuff. i tried the rice with sardines but just couldn't do it...I'm telling you this cuz i'm blaming the sardines on what would happen the following day.
So the next day we get up super early to head out to the next city. It was Saturday at 7 am and Tima got up and made us breakfast and ate with us, really sweet. then we all got into the van to head out to a more rural place where we were going to eat lunch with a family up in the mountains, mroe conservative, etc. The drive was super long and windy, like 3 hrs. We were in the very last row of this 16 seat bus. I normally don't get motion sickness like ever unless I'm sitting backwards, but I'm convinced the sardines mixed with the bumps and turns made me go bad. I ate a banana on the way...luckily nothing else. I was fine the whole time until we got to the house in the mountains. I mean, I felt awful and sweaty and not normal, but i just tried to keep it to myself, thinking it'd go away right away. wrong. we're all siting at the house on the ground, they just brought out the food to make delicious sandwiches with, i had no appetite, so i just took a nibble at a carrot slice and then i felt it. i stood up and basically was like, "if i have to throw up where do i do it?" so lindsey brought me over to some trees, i didnt throw up, but i ended up laying down in the house, trying to sleep but not being able to, my stomach pounding with pain, and oh man. so i miss the lunch and the talk the group got to have with the family --apparently extremely different and interesting, oh well-- and then just couldnt stand lying down anymore so i sat up and that's wehn it really hit me. i ran outside, started throwing up in my mouth but covered my mouth with my hand till i got to the trees, so it started spilling out and it ended up comign through my nose! gagg!! anyway, I end up throwing up my banana and the tiny bite of carrot and like a ton of other stuff...it just wouldn't stop coming out it was weird. too much information?!?! Then I felt better, sorta, still not normal, so I just sat outside and waited for them to finish talking to the family. and so then like 15 minutes later we're about to start walking towards the van when I was like holy cow. I ended up vomiting for 5 minutes there. I don't even KNOW what I was throwing up. I just couldnt control it!! so we get back in the van, start making the drive to our last city Chefchaouen, it was like an hr drive, I switched seats with someone up toward the front, and thought all would be fine. wrong. I asked Pablo, the Brazilian guy sitting next to me at the PERFECT time for a plastic bag just in case I needed it, and he handed it over to me right in the perfect moment for when I needed to puke. haha. so they stop the van, i get out, vomit, the driver gets out, starts talking to me in arabic to get on my knees and pours water over my neck, then pours some in my hands apparently telling me to drink it, but i thought he meant to splash my face, so i splash my face and the whole van starts cracking up, and phewwww. i had vomit all over me!! so i sat up very front with the wind blowing in my face till we got there, and all was good! so we get to chechauoen, its a pretty touristy city, it's in the north so a lot of spaniards go there and everyone speaks Spanish, and we were just there for the night to go shopping and eat and sleep in a hostel so I thought I was fine. I mean, I still felt kinda queezy but fine. so I bought a sprite to try and get something in my stomach, I sip on that, me and Jenny and Jen all go shopping, all is fine. we go to this place where they guy gives us a deal on the earrings and ends up being really nice to us three, helping us find each other when we couldn't find eachother etc. haha. so i'm looking at some stuff, and I was like, I don't feel good, I'm sorta sick and he was like, here, sit here. and so I sat. and then i was like, oh no. so he grabs me and runs me over to this public fountain where people can get water (its like a faucet, not your fountain fountain) and i get there at the perfect moment to throw up all the sprite i had drinken. and then some. dear lord it was weird. so I sat there for a bit while the other two shopped, then went and bought a shirt/dress thingy and sucked at bargaining so ended up paying way too much for it haha. oh well.. Needless to say I skipped out on dinner that night and made an attempt at sleeping...to no avail.
The next and last morning we got up early to take a hike up to a site to overlook the city at sunrise, it was cool and pretty. I felt a whole lot better then, just weak and sorta hungry, probably dehydrated. so then we got back in the van and headed back to a city called Ceuta, which is on teh african continent but is actually spanish territory, so we ended up walking across the 'border' between morocco and spain. kinda cool. then we took the ferry back across the straight to catch our respective rides home.
Morocco. I loved it. The weekend went by way too fast. I would've loved to stay there a lot longer. i just LOVE cross-cultural exchange. I think it should somehow be mandatory, cuz its sooo important to learn about other cultures to be able to understand them and why they do the things they do. I could say a trillion other things about it, like all the details and quotes from the weekend, but i think I've said enough for now! It was also on this trip that I realized I love traveling, but I love the type of traveling where you get to KNOW the people, culture, etc. I mean, going to Hungary and everywhere else is cool, but when you travel like that you're only seeing the outside. You don't get to know the ins and outs of their life, which I think is way more interesting and important than simply historical buildings and statues. And I suppose especially in a place like Morocco, where it's like no other country you've ever been to...well, out of South America and Europe... If I hadn't gone with this exchange program, there's no way I would've learned what I did and seen what I did. half the places we saw and went were places that tourists would never see. And I got to talk to Moroccans! And relate with them, and live with them!
gosh!
so yes, that's it. my long weekend in a big nutshell!
Sunday, April 27, 2008
woah. last month.
Well, as I think about how it's getting down to the wire now with being abroad, I get excited, nostalgic, anxious, nervous, sad, happy...everything...oh, and cynical. Really cynical. I think, well, I know, that I'm actually really ready to be home again, and the closer it gets to reality, the more I find myself critiquing everything here...well, mainly in my house. Today was the worst. ok, first of all, my room is kind of secluded from the rest of the 'house', the tv is always always always on and blasting for my almost deaf senora, and one of my host sister smokes so i shut my door leaving a crack open cuz i hate smoke. well, this means that basically, no one tells me when we're eating. This wouldn't be a problem if a)I wasn't in the house that day, b)I didn't eat, c)I didn't care, or d)there was a set meal time. BUT, there is no set meal time (ok, that makes sense, but still) and I do care, most of the time I'm starving by meal time due to lack of a decent breakfast or any other nutrients to last me the 7 hrs between my meals...ok ok i know i can buy food. and i do. BUT on sundays when the world shuts down, you have a problem. I've gotten in the habit of going out to the room and just waiting, but usually that's a lost cause because who knows WHAT my senora does in the kitchen... (tonight, she went in to start cooking dinner at 8:30, and it started smelling good by 9 so i was like, oh good, food soon. yah right. we were served at 10. want to know what it was? SPAGHETTI. um, it takes 10 minutes to boil water and make that. whhhat?) Anyway, so today I was in my room reading (soooo much reading...more later) and my senora comes in and was like, "you don't want lunch?" and i was just ugh. so i said, Well know one tells me, I can't hear cuz your tv, blah blah...i mean, i said it respectfully, but i think she maybe picked up on it? bad move on my part? oh well. anyway, I went out to the table and they were halfway done with lunch. thanks. SEE THIS? this is me being cynical. about every single detail. and it's not that bad. like, not being told about lunch and having to wait an hr and a half for spaghetti isn't that bad, i think it's just time. maybe?
And despite all my complaining up there, believe it or not but I AM having a good time and enjoying myself! I know I'm going to miss this city; just walking around the streets, doing some major people-watching and observing, seeing the motos take control of the road and not following any traffic signals or rules, taking detours due to all the 'edificios en obras,' or buildings under construction along the streets, going out for free tapas!, pretending i'm spanish (mostly unsuccessfully...), seeing the police just stopped along the side of the road in a plaza on their motos chattin' and watching construction along with the rest of the world (i guess you could compare that to the police-parked-along-the-side-of-the-road-eating-donuts theory in the States), sitting in plazas and the park, seeing some crazy european fashion, etc. It's been a good semester. Yah, it took me a bit more time to get acclimated here than in Chile, but it all turned out to be okay. I mean, my hygiene has significantly worsened (at least the bathing part), my work ethic has turned to mierda, and I'm super out of shape, but hey, I'm still alive and kickin'.
today is sunday. last time I showered was wednesday night. and I've run several times during that time. yummmmm.
Finally going to Morocco on Thursday and mannn am I stoked. Don't worry, I'll fill y'all in!
And despite all my complaining up there, believe it or not but I AM having a good time and enjoying myself! I know I'm going to miss this city; just walking around the streets, doing some major people-watching and observing, seeing the motos take control of the road and not following any traffic signals or rules, taking detours due to all the 'edificios en obras,' or buildings under construction along the streets, going out for free tapas!, pretending i'm spanish (mostly unsuccessfully...), seeing the police just stopped along the side of the road in a plaza on their motos chattin' and watching construction along with the rest of the world (i guess you could compare that to the police-parked-along-the-side-of-the-road-eating-donuts theory in the States), sitting in plazas and the park, seeing some crazy european fashion, etc. It's been a good semester. Yah, it took me a bit more time to get acclimated here than in Chile, but it all turned out to be okay. I mean, my hygiene has significantly worsened (at least the bathing part), my work ethic has turned to mierda, and I'm super out of shape, but hey, I'm still alive and kickin'.
today is sunday. last time I showered was wednesday night. and I've run several times during that time. yummmmm.
Finally going to Morocco on Thursday and mannn am I stoked. Don't worry, I'll fill y'all in!
Friday, April 18, 2008
Prague
I loved Prague!!! It's a really beautiful and well-kept city of orange roofs and old monuments and bridges and really nice people...and good food. Well ok not going to lie, we didn't really branch out too much with the food there because it's really touristy and therefore the prices are pretty high for poor college students, but we still had some good sausage, good Pilsner beer (famous Czech beer), and bagels and cream cheese. haha.
We went to the old castle grounds, which is basically a small town inside the city, with a cathedral, a museum, lots of other buildings that i don't even know what purpose they serve, restaurants, etc. We saw the famous changing of the guards while fighting to see over the smelly girl in front of us who decided to stand up in front of everyone behind her...but still cool. We also went to the famous Charles Bridge I dont know how many times. It's basically just a bridge for pedestrians filled with people selling jewelry, art of all sorts, people playing music, and tons of places to get your caricature done. haha, on our last time there, we were about to walk off the bridge when we saw this guy, probably about my age or a little older, in a penguin costume, playing a recorder TERRIBLY, just having the time of his life, trying to seduce all the people that walked by to give him some money. Meanwhile, a big group of his friends were just standing there cracking up the whole time.
Penguin guy actually made out pretty well...got some good tips. Next he pulled out a small little tambourine, but he wasnt nearly as successful. Afterwards, he decided to go and get a caricature with his earnings, while his friends handed out cans of Pilsner to the bystanders. holy cow it was hilarious.
Anyway, it was basically lots of walking around, seeing things and just chillin'. good weekend. oh also, someone in our hostel told us that he had heard that Budapest is a 'worse' version of Vienna, and Vienna is a 'worse' version of Prague. And well, I've only been to two of them, but yes, Prague definitely beats Budapest!
Ok, Granada has this week-long Feria de libros (book market?) just out in one of the big plazas, where there are loads and loads of book stands all lined up full of books and some authors there to sign books, so I'm off to go check it out! hasta luego
Wednesday, April 9, 2008
observations...
Ok, here’s the deal. Ever since the beginning of my stay in espana, my roommate Lara and I have been noticing little by little, and picking up on the lifestyle, attitudes, behavior of the ‘youth’ here. We’ve talked about it A LOT (behind their backs, of course), and obviously compared it to our lives back home, not with the intention of claiming one to be superior to the other, just simply comparing and contrasting and trying with all our might to understand it all. And well, I haven’t written anything about it yet because I didn’t want it to seem like I was complaining or anything—because I think that’s how I come across in the blog a lot, and I didn’t want to perpetuate that idea—but now, I’ve waited long enough and I just have to get it out of my system. AND I also think something like this is important to realize and remember later on, especially because it constitutes a pretty big portion of my life here. AND, a professor of Lara has confirmed our thoughts/ideas of the generalized – which is important to keep in mind – Spanish youth with studies, which puts me a little bit more at ease as I just let it all out.
Ok first of all, my senora’s two daughters are 19 and 21 years old. They don’t go to school. Each took courses, the 19 year old one just started last week working at a daycare in the mornings, and the 21 yr old one got her first job in like march or something, worked 1 week and decided she didn’t like her boss so she quit the following week, and has remained jobless ever since. I have no idea what she does.
As far as what I’ve seen/heard/experienced in my house, there is a significant lack of respect for the older generation(s), and according to a professor, this has been a characteristic of this generation, and it continues to grow in impact (? don’t know how to word it…) with the younger generations—meaning, it’s just expanding and getting worse. True, true, you could say, well, everyone yells at and fights with and disobeys their mom, BUT they just pay no respect whatsoever to the person who makes their every meal, who wakes them up for work, who does their laundry, who makes their bed, who cleans their room, etc. instead, it’s: “MAMA, TRAE EL AGUA. NO QUIERO LEVANTARME,” or simply ignoring her. It wouldn’t call our attention so much if the people we saw doing this and acting in this way were like 10 yrs old maybe, but no, this is the normal behavior of a 21-year old. Whhhhhhat? So of course, this leads me to compare it to Chile, and therefore, the Hispanic culture, and therefore maturity: living at home till you get married, not working because “there is no reason to, since you have your parents to support you,” having no responsibility, etc. Basically, the maturity level is just at a completely different level. Which is fine. It’s just different, and clearly requires an adjustment period. I’ve been with it now going on 8 months, and I’m still baffled by what I hear and see. However, it’s also kinda the ‘guilt’ of the older generation, too; they just maintain the standards, without changing their comportment, even if they have a problem with the ‘youth system.’ I don’t get it.
Lara and I have noticed that in our house, it just seems like a constant attack or demand of their mom, and even though she clearly gets mad and frustrated and seems to feel powerless, she still does everything the same, gives no punishment, and lets them keep living their life how they want, without daring being interrupted by their mother, who single-handedly raised them herself. Wow, long sentence. Anyway, we’ve wanted to ask our senora about their behavior, well, in a very roundabout way, especially when she’s mad, so she can identify with what we’re referring to, but we’ve wimped out. It’s tough, because I think and believe it would most likely come across to her as an ‘attack’ on her daughters, or how she raised them, seeing as how she says she’s American (she lived there for a couple of years…doesn’t speak a lick of English…) and doesn’t agree with a lot (the majority) of things that go on in the States, how the way of life doesn’t fit her, etc.
So anyway, it’s really tough sometimes, I think mainly because a lot of it occurs at meal time, when we’re seated at the table and can first-handedly see and hear what’s going on. Several times we have just been so awestruck at the table that we have nothing to say, NOTHING, and end up sitting there, speechless, staring at each other, wanting so badly to speak up and tell them to act their age, but just leaving the table in silence instead.
At the same time, I think our household has a really different environment because a)there is no father figure, b)these girls have had at least one girl—most likely 2 girls—living in their house EVERY semester for the past 11 years. Yes, 11 years. So I can only imagine that this would have something to do with their behavior, though I’d hardly say that’s a valid reason to act the way they do, and c) I haven’t come up with a ‘c’ yet. haha Ideas?!
Oh one more thing regarding Spanish youth. They are surprisingly (generally-speaking, of course) apathetic. In many regards. But on the other hand, lara and I realized that at home we are pretty much just surrounded by people at school who are go-getters, have goals, want to change the world, ya know, that type of people. but here, well, we’re not surrounded by that type of Spanish people, so it’s just a different atmosphere, and it really catches us off-guard. They really give the impression that they have no power whatsoever (mainly girls) to change anything, help anything, etc. for example, girls and sports: it’s still at a point here in spain where girls don’t really have sports teams, don’t play sports, etc., because that’s just not ‘right.’ Well, I’ve talked to several girls about this who would like to play sports, but they say that since there are no established teams or programs for them they have no opportunity to do anything. And I was like, wellllllll why don’t you do something about that???? Like, get with your firneds who want to do that with you and make something of it? And basically they’re just like, noooo, nothing would happen, we can’t change that, blah blah blah. GAG. It makes me think of that John Mayer song, “Waiting on the world to change.” Jajaj, which is funny because I really love that song, but I guess the message of it isn’t so great…anyway, it just ASTOUNDS ME.
Ok that’s it for now. Probably doesn’t seem like much, oh but it is. It actually makes it really hard for me to relate with them on a lot of levels. Well, aside from the fact that they don’t really talk to me, it just makes me really mad when they yell incessantly at her. And they do it in front of their friends and boyfriends, and they just act as if it’s completely normal. I’m like, um, no. at least act fake in front of your friends so they don’t have to see how bad you get along with your mom. Hahah But no. and the friends/bf’s just seem normal with it, even sometimes join the conversation. ??????? Man, if I went to a friend’s house and he/she started screaming at his/her mom or dad, I’d quietly leave the room, or AT LEAST stare at the ground and pretend to be invisible…right? Wowww.
OK now I’m really done for now.
Hugs.
Ok first of all, my senora’s two daughters are 19 and 21 years old. They don’t go to school. Each took courses, the 19 year old one just started last week working at a daycare in the mornings, and the 21 yr old one got her first job in like march or something, worked 1 week and decided she didn’t like her boss so she quit the following week, and has remained jobless ever since. I have no idea what she does.
As far as what I’ve seen/heard/experienced in my house, there is a significant lack of respect for the older generation(s), and according to a professor, this has been a characteristic of this generation, and it continues to grow in impact (? don’t know how to word it…) with the younger generations—meaning, it’s just expanding and getting worse. True, true, you could say, well, everyone yells at and fights with and disobeys their mom, BUT they just pay no respect whatsoever to the person who makes their every meal, who wakes them up for work, who does their laundry, who makes their bed, who cleans their room, etc. instead, it’s: “MAMA, TRAE EL AGUA. NO QUIERO LEVANTARME,” or simply ignoring her. It wouldn’t call our attention so much if the people we saw doing this and acting in this way were like 10 yrs old maybe, but no, this is the normal behavior of a 21-year old. Whhhhhhat? So of course, this leads me to compare it to Chile, and therefore, the Hispanic culture, and therefore maturity: living at home till you get married, not working because “there is no reason to, since you have your parents to support you,” having no responsibility, etc. Basically, the maturity level is just at a completely different level. Which is fine. It’s just different, and clearly requires an adjustment period. I’ve been with it now going on 8 months, and I’m still baffled by what I hear and see. However, it’s also kinda the ‘guilt’ of the older generation, too; they just maintain the standards, without changing their comportment, even if they have a problem with the ‘youth system.’ I don’t get it.
Lara and I have noticed that in our house, it just seems like a constant attack or demand of their mom, and even though she clearly gets mad and frustrated and seems to feel powerless, she still does everything the same, gives no punishment, and lets them keep living their life how they want, without daring being interrupted by their mother, who single-handedly raised them herself. Wow, long sentence. Anyway, we’ve wanted to ask our senora about their behavior, well, in a very roundabout way, especially when she’s mad, so she can identify with what we’re referring to, but we’ve wimped out. It’s tough, because I think and believe it would most likely come across to her as an ‘attack’ on her daughters, or how she raised them, seeing as how she says she’s American (she lived there for a couple of years…doesn’t speak a lick of English…) and doesn’t agree with a lot (the majority) of things that go on in the States, how the way of life doesn’t fit her, etc.
So anyway, it’s really tough sometimes, I think mainly because a lot of it occurs at meal time, when we’re seated at the table and can first-handedly see and hear what’s going on. Several times we have just been so awestruck at the table that we have nothing to say, NOTHING, and end up sitting there, speechless, staring at each other, wanting so badly to speak up and tell them to act their age, but just leaving the table in silence instead.
At the same time, I think our household has a really different environment because a)there is no father figure, b)these girls have had at least one girl—most likely 2 girls—living in their house EVERY semester for the past 11 years. Yes, 11 years. So I can only imagine that this would have something to do with their behavior, though I’d hardly say that’s a valid reason to act the way they do, and c) I haven’t come up with a ‘c’ yet. haha Ideas?!
Oh one more thing regarding Spanish youth. They are surprisingly (generally-speaking, of course) apathetic. In many regards. But on the other hand, lara and I realized that at home we are pretty much just surrounded by people at school who are go-getters, have goals, want to change the world, ya know, that type of people. but here, well, we’re not surrounded by that type of Spanish people, so it’s just a different atmosphere, and it really catches us off-guard. They really give the impression that they have no power whatsoever (mainly girls) to change anything, help anything, etc. for example, girls and sports: it’s still at a point here in spain where girls don’t really have sports teams, don’t play sports, etc., because that’s just not ‘right.’ Well, I’ve talked to several girls about this who would like to play sports, but they say that since there are no established teams or programs for them they have no opportunity to do anything. And I was like, wellllllll why don’t you do something about that???? Like, get with your firneds who want to do that with you and make something of it? And basically they’re just like, noooo, nothing would happen, we can’t change that, blah blah blah. GAG. It makes me think of that John Mayer song, “Waiting on the world to change.” Jajaj, which is funny because I really love that song, but I guess the message of it isn’t so great…anyway, it just ASTOUNDS ME.
Ok that’s it for now. Probably doesn’t seem like much, oh but it is. It actually makes it really hard for me to relate with them on a lot of levels. Well, aside from the fact that they don’t really talk to me, it just makes me really mad when they yell incessantly at her. And they do it in front of their friends and boyfriends, and they just act as if it’s completely normal. I’m like, um, no. at least act fake in front of your friends so they don’t have to see how bad you get along with your mom. Hahah But no. and the friends/bf’s just seem normal with it, even sometimes join the conversation. ??????? Man, if I went to a friend’s house and he/she started screaming at his/her mom or dad, I’d quietly leave the room, or AT LEAST stare at the ground and pretend to be invisible…right? Wowww.
OK now I’m really done for now.
Hugs.
Monday, April 7, 2008
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